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When to study

anurag069 — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 14:15:29 +0000

When to study

Usually a student is blamed if she/he fails to secure pass marks. But we, students, sometimes think that it is not the fault of a student if one fails because a year has only 365 days. Sunday – 52 Sundays in a year (they are meant for rest and watching TV) the remaining days are 313. Summer Holidays – 60 days (weather is so hot and it`s difficult to study). Eight hours of daily sleep, which means 122 days in a year what is left is 131 days. An hour, daily for conversation (man is a social being) which means 15 days. The rest are 116. Two hours every day for food and other delicacies, which means 30 days, leaving only 86. One hour for playing and other work everyday that means 15 days. The balance ? Well 71. Examination days, per year, at least 21 days . The leftover are 50. Winter vacation, festivals, parties, picnics and other holidays – 40 days What remains are 10 days. For sickness, at least 6 days. The rest 4 days – movies at least three days. The remainder is one day. Only one day left for annual days. So will our teachers kindly tell us when to study so as to fare well in exams?

Hope you liked the joke.Do comment!!

INTERESTING FACTS

tejaswinita — Sun, 16 Dec 2007 02:50:22 +0000

Some interesting facts
A zebra is white with black stripes.
All the planets in our solar system rotate anticlockwise, except Venus. It is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
Hummingbirds are the only animal that can also fly backwards.
Insects do not make noises with their voices. The noise of bees, mosquitoes and other buzzing insects is caused by rapidly moving their wings.
The cockroach is the fastest animal on 6 legs covering a meter a second.
The word “listen” contains the same letters as the word “silent“.
The only 2 animals that can see behind itself without turning it’s head are the rabbit and the parrot.
A ‘jiffy’ is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.
India invented the Number System. Zero was invented by Aryabhatta.
The whip makes a cracking sound because its tip moves faster than the speed of sound.
A hippopotamus can run faster than a man.
India never invaded any country in her last 10000 years of history.
‘Hippopotomonstroses quippedaliophobia’ is the fear of long words.
Didaskaleinophobia is the fear of going to school.
Phobatrivaphobia is a fear of trivia about phobias!!
It is impossible to lick your elbow. (We know you gonna try this!!!)
A snail can sleep for 3 years. (Wow, lucky chap he?)
The names of the continents all end with the same letter with which they start
In 1883 the explosion of the volcano Krakatoa put so much dust into the earth’s atmosphere that sunsets appeared green and the moon appeared blue around the world for almost two years.
“Almost” is the longest word in the English language with all the letters in alphabetical order.
Twenty-Four- Karat Gold is not pure gold since there is a small amount of copper in it. Absolutely pure gold is so soft that it can be molded with the hands.
Electricity doesn’t move through a wire but through a field around the wire.
Do you know the names of the three wise monkeys? They are: Mizaru (See no evil), Mikazaru (Hear no evil), and Mazaru (Say no evil).
55 per cent of people yawn within 5 minutes of seeing someone else yawn. Reading about yawning makes most people yawn. Hello, zzzzz zzzz ?

Unique love letter

anurag069 — Sat, 15 Dec 2007 11:05:25 +0000

A different Love Letter

A different Love letter and a beautiful reply to it.

A teenage college guy sent a love letter (in Q/A format) to his classmate.

My Dearest Reshma,

Please answer the following questionnaire. For Options

(A) 10 marks,
(b) 5marks and
(c) 3 marks.

**********

1) Whenever you enter the class room, your sight always falls on me because:

(a) of love
(b) you couldn’t control seeing me
(c) really … Am I doing it?

**********

2) Whenever professor cracks joke, you laugh and turn and look at me because:

(a) you always like to see me smiling
(b) you are testing whether I like jokes
(c) you are attracted by my smile

**********

3) When you were singing in the class, I entered and immediately you stopped singing because:

(a) you are so coy to sing before me
(b) my presence influenced you
(c) you feared that whether I’ll like your song

**********

4) When you were showing your childhood photo, when I asked for it, you hide it because:

(a) you felt ashamed
(b) you felt uneasy
(c) you don’t know

**********

5) During trekking, myself and my friend gave you hand for lifting you and you took only my friend’s because:

(a) you enjoyed my disappointment
(b) you won’t feel leaving my hand after grabbing
(c) you don’t know

**********

6) You were waiting yesterday for bus and didn’t get into your bus…

(a) you were waiting for me
(b) you were dreaming about me and didn’t notice the bus
(c) that bus was crowded

**********

7) You introduced me to your parents when they came to college because:

(a) I am going to be your groom
(b) you just want to know what your parents think about me
(c) just you felt like introducing me to them

**********

I told that I like girls wearing roses. Next day, you came with a rose on your head because:

(a) to fulfill my wish
(b) you like roses
(c) by chance you got a rose

**********

9) On that day, it was my birthday. You too came to temple early at 6:00 A.M because:

(a) you want to pray along with me
(b) you want to meet me before any one could meet on my birthday
(c) you want to wish me at temple because you are spiritual.

**********

If you have scored more than 40, then you are loving me. Don’t delay in expressing it.

If you have scored between 30 and 40, love is budding in your heart and it’s getting ready to bloom. If you have scored less than 30, you are in confusion whether to love me or not.

Eagerly awaiting your reply..

Love , Aakash

************ *********

Reshma’s reply letter was also in Q/A format ……..

Aakash ,

Please answer the following Yes/No questionnaire.

**********

1) If somebody sits in the first row, normally people entering the class, sees them.

(a) Yes (b) No

**********

2) If a girl laughs and looks anyone, is it love?

(a) Yes (b) No

**********

3) While singing, if somebody forgets lines of the songs, will he/she stop singing or not?

(a) Yes (b) No

**********

4) I was showing to my friends (who are all girls) my childhood photo.

You poked your nose inside….. Right ?

(a) Yes (b) No

**********

5) I avoided to hold your hand during trekking. Couldn’t you understand yet?

(a) Yes (b) No

**********

6) Should I not wait for my best friend (Anjali ) at the bus stand?

(a)Yes (b) No

**********

7) Shouldn’t I introduce you to my parents as a friend?

(a) Yes (b) No

**********

You have said you also like Lotus, cauliflower, banana’s flower. Is it true ?

(a) Yes (b) No

**********

9) Oh was that your birthday. That’s why I could see you in temple. I come daily to Temple. Do you know ?

(a) Yes (b) No

If you have answered “Yes” to any of the question, then I am not loving you. If you have answered “No”, then you don’t know the meaning of Love.

Hope everything is clear to you .

**********

FUNNY BUT MEANINGFUL QUESTIONS….

tejaswinita — Tue, 27 Nov 2007 18:21:05 +0000

Bang ur head on the wall if u don’t know the answer.
Recently a company had participated in IIM’s Placement Sessions.
They asked some interesting questions to students during recruitment.
Here are some of them:-
1. There is one word in the English language that is always pronounced incorrectly. What is it?
2. A man gave one son 10 cents and another son was given 15 cents. What time is it?
3. A boat has a ladder that has six rungs, each rung is one foot apart. The bottom rung is one foot from the water.
The tide rises at 12 inches every 15minutes. High tide peaks in one hour. When the tide is at it’s highest, how many rungs are under water?
4. There is a house with four walls. Each wall faces south. There is a window in each wall. A bear walks by one of the windows. What color is the bear?
5. Is half of two plus two equal to two or three?
6. There is a room. The shutters are blowing in. There is broken glass on the floor. There is water on the floor. You find Sloppy dead on the floor. Who is Sloppy? How did Sloppy die?
7. How much dirt would be in a hole 6 feet deep and 6 feet wide that has been dug with a square edged shovel?
8. If I were in Hawaii and dropped a bowling ball in a bucket of water which is 45 degrees F, and dropped another ball of the same weight, mass, and size in a bucket at 30 degrees F, both of them at the same time, which ball would hit the bottom of the bucket first?
Same question, but the location is in Canada ?
9. What is the significance of the following: The year is 1978, thirty-four minutes past noon on May 6th.
10. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in the center field?
11. What is it that goes up and goes down but does not move?
1. The word “incorrectly. ”
2. 1:45. The man gave away a total of 25 cents. He divided it between two people. Therefore, he gave a quarter to two.
3. None, the boat rises with the tide. Googly
4. White. If all the walls face south, the house is at the North pole, and the bear, therefore, is a polar bear.
5. Three. Well, it seems that it could almost be either, but if you follow the mathematical orders of operation, division is performed before addition.
So… Half of two is one. Then add two, and the answer is three.
6. Sloppy is a (gold)fish. The wind blew the shutters in, which knocked his goldfish-bowl off the table, and it broke, killing him.
7. None. No matter how big a hole is, it’s still a hole: the absence of dirt.
8. Both questions, same answer: the ball in the bucket of 45 degree F water hits the bottom of the bucket last. Did you think that the water in the 30 degree F bucket is frozen? Think again.
The question said nothing about that bucket having anything in it. Therefore, there is no water (or ice) to slow the ball down…
9. The time and month/date/year American style calendar are 12:34, 5/6/78.
10. One. If he combines all of his haystacks, they all become one big stack.
11. The temperature.

Tongue Twisters

tejaswinita — Thu, 22 Nov 2007 06:08:57 +0000

1. If you understand, say “understand”. If you don’t understand, say “don’t understand”. But if you understand and say “don’t understand”. How do I understand that you understand? Understand!

2. I wish to wish the wish you wish to wish, but if you wish the wish the witch wishes, I won’t wish the wish you wish to wish.

3. Sounding by sound is a sound method of sounding sounds.

4 .A sailors went to sea to see, what he could see. And all he could see was sea, sea, sea.

5. Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People, Purple Paper People

6 .If two witches were watching two watches, which witch would watch which watch?

7 .I thought a thought. But the thought I thought wasn’t the thought I thought I thought. If the thought I thought I thought had been the thought I thought, I wouldn’t have thought so much.

8 .Once a fellow met a fellow in a field of beans. Said a fellow to a fellow, “If a fellow asks a fellow, Can a fellow tell a fellow what a fellow means?”

9. Mr Inside went over to see Mr. Outside. Mr. Inside stood outside and called to Mr. Outside inside.
Mr. Outside answered Mr. Inside from inside and Told Mr. Inside to come inside. Mr. Inside said “NO”, and told Mr. Outside to come outside.
Mr. Outside and Mr. Inside argued from inside and outside about going outside or coming inside. Finally, Mr. Outside coaxed Mr. Inside to come inside, and then both Mr. Outside and Mr. Inside went outside to the riverside.

10.SHE SELLS SEA SHELLS ON THE SEA SHORE , BUT THE SEA SHELLS THAT SHE SELLS, ON THE SEA SHORE ARE NOT THE REAL ONES

11. The owner of the inside inn was inside his inside inn with his inside outside his inside inn.

12. If one doctor doctors another doctor does the doctor who doctors the doctor doctor the doctor the way the doctor he is doctoring doctors? Or does the doctor doctor the way the doctor who doctors doctors?
“When a doctor falls ill another doctor doctor’s the doctor. Does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctor the doctor in his own way or does the doctor doctoring the doctor doctors the doctor in the doctor’s way”

13.We surely shall see the sun shine shortly. Whether the weather be fine, or whether the weather be not, Whether the weather be cold Or whether the weather be hot, We’ll weather the weather Whatever the weather, Whether we like it or not. Watch? Whether the weather is hot.
Whether the weather is cold. Whether the weather is either or not. It is whether we like it or not.

14.Nine nice night nurses nursing nicely .

15 .A flea and a fly in a flue Said the fly “Oh what should we do” Said the flea” Let us fly Said the fly “Let us flee” So they flew through a flaw in the flue

16.If you tell Tom to tell a tongue-twister his tongue will be twisted as tongue-twister twists tongues.

17.Mr. See owned a saw. And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now See’s saw sawed Soar’s seesaw Before Soar saw See, Which made Soar sore. Had Soar seen See’s saw Before See sawed Soar’s seesaw, See’s saw would not have sawed Soar’s seesaw. So See’s saw sawed Soar’s seesaw. But it was sad to see Soar so sore just because See’s saw sawed Soar’s seesaw ……..

This is HOW GEN MEN GET INTO TROUBLE

tejaswinita — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 21:08:44 +0000

One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a river, his axe fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, ” Why are you crying?”
The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water, and he needed the axe to make his living.
The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe.
“Is this your axe?” the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, “No.”
The Lord again went down and came up with a silver axe. “Is this your axe?” the Lord asked.
Again, the woodcutter replied, “No.”
The Lord went down again and came up with an iron axe.
“Is this your axe?” the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, “Yes.”
The Lord was pleased with the man’s honesty and gave him all three axes to keep, and the woodcutter went home happy.
******
Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his wife along the riverbank, and his wife fell into the river.
When he cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked him, “Why are you crying?”
“Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!”
The Lord went down into the water and came up with Jennifer Lopez.
“Is this your wife? ” the Lord asked.
“Yes,” cried the woodcutter.
The Lord was furious. “You lied! That is an untruth!”
The woodcutter replied, “Oh, forgive me, my Lord.. It is a misunderstanding.
You see, if I had said ‘no’ to Jennifer Lopez , You would have come up with Catherine Zeta-Jones. Then if I said ‘no’ to her, you would have come up with my wife. Had I then said ‘yes,’ you would have given me all three.
Lord, I am a poor man, and am not able to take care of all three wives, so THAT’S why I said yes to Jennifer Lopez .”
******

MAINTAINING A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY IN THE OFFICE

tejaswinita — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 14:42:06 +0000

ONE POINT OFFICE DARES

1) Run one lap around the office at top speed.
2) Groan out loud in the toilet cubicle (at least one other ‘non-player’ must be in the toilet at the time).
3) Ignore the first five people who say ‘good morning’ to you
4) Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say, “Just called to say I can’t talk right now. Bye.”
5) To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace.
6) When someone hands you a piece of paper, finger it, and whisper huskily, “Mmmmmmm, that feels soooooo good
7) Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say, “Sorry, I really prefer it this way”. Walk sideways to the photocopier.
9) While riding a lift, gasp dramatically every time the doors open.

THREE-POINTS DARES

1) Say to your boss, “I like your style” and shoot him with double-barrelled fingers.
2) Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask, “Did you get all that, I don’t want to have to repeat it”.
3) Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your voice).
4) Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle (there must be a ‘non-player’ within sight).
5) Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

FIVE POINT DARES
1) At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).
2) Walk into a very busy person’s office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.
3) For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as “Bob”.
4) Announce to everyone in a meeting that you “really have to go do a number two”.
5) After every sentence, say ‘Mon’ in a really bad Jamaican accent. As in “the report’s on your desk, Mon”. Keep this up for one hour.
6) While an office mate is out, move their chair into the lift.
7) In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead; repeatedly and mutter, “Shut up, damn it, all of you just shut up!”.

Real techies worries

tejaswinita — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 14:39:45 +0000

Tech Support: “I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.”
Customer “Ok.”
Tech Support: “Did you get a pop-up menu?”
Customer: “No.”
Tech Support: “Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?”
Customer “No.”
Tech Support:: “Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until
this point?”
Customer: “Sure, you told me to write ‘click’ and I wrote ‘click’.”

=======================================================================

2)
Customer: “I received the software update you sent, but I am still
getting the same error message.”
Tech Support:: “Did you install the update?”
Customer: “No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?”

========================================================================
3).
Customer:: “I’m having trouble installing Microsoft Word.”
Tech Support:: “Tell me what you’ve done.”
Customer: “I typed ‘A:SETUP’.”
Tech Support:: “Ma’am, remove the disk and tell me what it says.”
Customer:: “It says ‘[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk’.”
Tech Support:: “Insert the MS Word setup disk.”
Customer:: “What?”
Tech Support: “Did you buy MS word?”
Customer: “No…”

=========================================================================
4)
Customer:: “Do I need a computer to use your software?”
Tech Support:: ?!%#$

==========================================================================
5)
.Tech Support:: “Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen, can
you see the ‘OK’ button displayed?”
Customer: “Wow. How can you see my screen from there?”

===========================================================================
6)
Tech Support:: “What type of computer do you have?”
Customer:: “A white one.”

===========================================================================
7).
Tech Support:: “Type ‘A:’ at the prompt.”
Customer:: “How do you spell that?”

===========================================================================

Ways of hiding an ELEPHANT

tejaswinita — Sun, 18 Nov 2007 19:53:38 +0000

SEE THIS…

The house the golf built

tejaswinita — Sun, 18 Nov 2007 19:28:14 +0000

This is the house of the Tigerwoods…

An American Professional Golfer………