Huntme007

1. If u think a girl is beautiful, she’ll always have a boyfriend to confirm that
2. The nicer she is…the quicker u will be dumped!!!!!
3. The more the makeup, worse the looks…
4. “99% of the girls in this world are beautiful. Remaining 1% would always be in your company.”……………..100% true
5. The guy standing next to a beautiful girl can never be her brother.
6. If by any chance the girl you like , likes you too, she will let you know in about 10 years from now ,when you are committed..
7. The more you ignore a girl, the more she’ll want to be friends with you.
8. Theory of relativity…..        The more u run towards a hot chick….the more she goes away from u…
9. Rule 1: Even if you got her out alone… just when you are about to let her know about your feelings…she will spot a long lost friend( I guess from Kumbh ka Mela)

Corollary to rule 1: The more desperate you are to tell your feelings to a girl on a private chat, the more probability the long lost friend she discovered is a handsome superman, who beats you in everything 9:1

Axiom 1: The more dedicated you are to the girl, the longer it takes before things work out, but ultimately it will (somesmile for the guys)

10. the day the chick you really like comes and speaks to you will be the day when-

1. You are dressed badly
2. You forgot to brush your teeth for the first time in your life
3.Have a bad hair day

11. all the good girls are either nuns or married .the rest go around with u and ruin ur money,health and leave u a total wreck.

12. the more seriously u like a girl…the more seriously her dad will hate u

13. the love you shower a girl with is directly proportional to the number of bullets her dad will be showering at you

The best way to improve your poker skills is to practice. There are many online poker sites out there that have both play-money games as well as real-money games with low stakes.Here is omaha poker strategy

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven’t played Solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don’t have e-mail addresses.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn’t have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile.

12. You’re reading this and nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn’t#9 on this list
AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING at yourself.

Amitabh : apka 13th question 25 lakh yeh raha apke samne..

Contestant Santa Singh is tensed.

Amitabh : Who is the father of Abhishek Bachan

Computer Screen:

A. Amitabh Bachan B. Laloo Prasad Yadav C. Moh. Azhar D. General
Perverz Musharaff.

Amitabh : Apka kya jawab hai ? ( He is quite sure that Santa will opt
for
A) But Santa is still confused.

Amitabh : Apke pas do life line hai..(50:50 and phone a friend)

Santa: I think it is A but am not sure.

Amitabh : Not sure… Hmmm Ap kya karna chahenge?

Santa : I would like to use 50:50?

Amitabh: Ok computer , 2 galat javabo ko mita de..

Computer after deleting two names, leaves two options which are: -

B. Laloo Prasad Yadav.
C. Moh. Azhar.

Amitabh is confused and tensed thinks how come the computer has made
this mistake But as is said in bollywood the show must go on. Now Santa
is confused. Santa: i would like to use the last life line phone a
friend..

Amitabh : Ap kisko phone karna chahenge?

Santa : Mein Jaya Bachan ji ko phone karna
chahoonga………………………………………………………

How a man withdraws cash from ATM.

1) Park the car
2) Go to ATM
3) Insert card
4) Enter PIN
5) Take money
6) Drive away

How a woman withdraws cash from ATM

1) Park the car
2) Check makeup
3) Turn off engine
4) Check makeup
5) Go to ATM
6) Hunt for ATM card in the purse.
7) Insert card
Hit Cancel
9) Hunt in purse for chit with PIN written on it.
10) Insert card
11) Enter PIN
12) Take cash
13) Go to car
14) Check makeup
15) Start car
16) Stop car
17) Run back to ATM
18) Take ATM card
19) Back to car
20) Check makeup
21) Start car
22) Check makeup
23) Drive for ½ mile
24) Release hand-brake
25) Drive on.
SNE………..